What would we honestly do without football? Weekends would be spent aimlessly and the feeling of emptiness would just be too much to bear.

However, when it comes to the greatest football tournament on Earth, it’s an entirely different scene. Mamaks are jam packed daily, and everyone’s suddenly ‘feeling unwell’ for a month to attend a friend’s birthday party down in TREC.

With an incredible number of Malaysians from all ages and all walks of life who can relate to this, the question does remain: how do you pick out a truly passionate kaki bola and not a lalang chong?

Now that we are halfway into the world's greatest football tournament, we give you the low-down on how to pick out some of Malaysia’s most passionate fans.

1. You’ve gone to the anneh and asked for footballer-inspired haircut

For the guys out there, you’ve all been to the anneh in your taman at least once in your lifetime for a trim. Yes, at times, you don’t get the exact cut that you’ve asked for.

Wait, who are you kidding? You NEVER get the exact cut you want. But, how many times have you gone in with a picture of Ronaldo (both, the Brazilian legend and the prima-donna CR7)? How often have you asked for Beckham’s iconic mohawk?

That’s right, you don’t remember, because it's way too often!

2. You have immense bargaining skills from all the time spent buying your favourite jerseys

For most of you, trips made here were purely to get your hands on the latest ‘cheap’ jerseys for the upcoming season, especially if you reside in Klang Valley. This is also where your negotiation skills are put to the test. Some might say it’s almost a test of your national identity!

The key here is to hunt in packs. Firstly, be patient and weary of being lured out of formation by fake discount signs. Secondly, identify your target, especially the ones who are isolated and all alone with the possession.

Thirdly, outnumber your opponent, counter-attack when they’re at their most vulnerable, and ask for the price. As soon as this is answered, be ruthless and kill the game off with this, “Boss/Aunty, BEST price berapa?”

3. You tend to live in the past

It’s impossible to be a football fan and never having engaged in banter. When this happens, the fall-back argument will always have something to do with history.

Brazilians would go back on the happy days of the R’s quartet, Spanish fans on their glorious tiki-taka generation when Fernando Torres could still find the net, Italian and Dutch fans on when they were still good enough to even qualify, and English fans on last night’s game, because that’s the only history they’ve got.

However, this goes perfectly in hand on how most of us view Malaysian football itself, always reminiscing on the times of Mokhtar Dahari, rather than the present.

Sigh, how we've missed the glory days of Malaysian football.

4. You’ve owned a fair share of old school football merchandise

You might remember the 2006 tournament but do you remember these mobile top-up cards that came along?

These cards were buzz in schools, and it probably ruined some friendships along the way too. Put simply, if you had the RM 60 top-up card of Steven Gerrard or the elusive RM 100 card of Thierry Henry, you’d be the coolest kid in school!

If that doesn’t ring a bell then the football-themed erasers surely will.

The game was simple; 'siapa menang, dia rampas'. The goal was to have your eraser sit on top of your opponent’s, and if you succeed, both erasers and bragging rights are yours!

Oh, and who could forget those giant huge posters that came along with your favourite football magazines?

5. You’ve tried to replicate the insane goals the next time you play futsal

The time when you and your friends meet up for your usual weekly futsal session is when you can witness all sorts of skills on display. There’ll always be the bajet dribblers in each team, but you got to give it to them; when they do score, it’s usually something spectacular.

The best part though, is the celebration, as the whole team joins in to replicate what they saw during previous round of matches. Classic celebrations include polishing the boot and the thumb-sucker.

6. Your best mates are from rivalling teams

This right here is the beauty of football, especially the when it comes to the world's greatest tournament. How many of you have best friends who support some of your fiercest rivals?

Most fans have gotten sick over England’s dire performances, but everyone also has a BFF who is still a die-hard English fan. How many times have you heard heated debates from several groups about Spain or France being the top dog in Europe, only to be seated on the same table and chugging teh tarik together?

If you’re wondering why even put up with all these differences, it’s because you’re not going to end up having enough players to play futsal the very next day. True story.

7. You’re very familiar with football shows in Malaysia

Remember 'Bola@mamak'? Or does watching Dez Corkhill and Steve McMahon on local TV ring a bell? What about tuning in to football shows that was hosted by Roshan Narayan?

Most of you would certainly have fond memories of these, as no football experience in Malaysia is complete without the above. These shows not only gave you a chance to build your footballing knowledge, but also gave you some kick-ass banter to use on your mates.

So, there you have it; the ultimate signs to identify a true Malaysian football fan.

Now, how would you like to makan, minum and watch a game of footie with your fellow football-loving Malaysians?

The makers of probably the best beer in the world, Carlsberg, wants you to hang out with your friends and other football fans at the football parties that they will be throwing throughout the month.

On top watching the football matches live with fellow supporters, there will be loads of football-themed activities for you to participate in where you can win some official merchandise as well as some really cool prizes.

Check out where you can catch these football parties by clicking on this link right here.

For more information, head on over to Carlsberg’s official website by clicking here.