NEWS
China Bans Girls from Eating Bananas “Seductively” Online
China since its establishment as The People’s Republic of China in 1949 placed a ban on porn. Anyone guilty of producing, distributing or even purchasing “naughty” books, magazines or videos will be penalized. While what the government considers “pornographic” can be considered vague, their recent ban is pretty much spelt out – “no eating damn bananas while using live-streaming services in a seductive manner!”
GIF: Imgur
Yes, dear netizens. So, who the Hell decides what is or isn’t considered “seductive” banana consumption? What about other similarly phallic fruits/vegetables like cucumbers? Are popsicles alright? ‘Cause we know of some people who’d enjoy that tremendously. Wasn’t it Martin Luther King who once said he had a dream about having his children live in a place where women can eat bananas or whatever fruit they damn well want in any manner without the fear of repercussion? No, seriously. Was it him? We can’t remember. This recent ban is all part of China's relentless effort to crack down on “inappropriate and erotic content online.”
Image: Screen Captured from YouTube
Just last month, China’s Ministry of Culture announced that all of the major live-streaming platforms – Douyu, Panda.tv, YY, Zhanqi TV, and Huya were under investigation for hosting content that’s deemed “too vulgar, violent, or too sexual”. The new regulations require the hosts of the live-streaming service to monitor all their output twenty four hours a day, seven days a week. And oh, the Ministry of Culture has also banned women from live-streaming while wearing stockings or suspenders, so there’s that. We’re not really sure how exactly they’re gonna monitor these girls 24/7, but we’re guessing whoever that task got assigned to isn’t complaining and will be working late for quite some time. That poor soul.
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